I grew!

It’s true! Somehow, I grew!?!?

I have been processing this for a few weeks, ever since my annual physical, when the lovely Linda, my doctor’s assistant extraordinaire, measured my weight and height. I realize now that usually my doctor does this task, and he simply takes the numbers, writes them down, and we are done. Linda, on the other hand, announced the numbers to me…as if to confirm them.

Now, I know that many people may be interested more in their weight measurement, however, it was my height that caught me off guard. So much so that my response was an eloquent: “Huh???” To which Linda, looked more puzzled than me! She repeated: “Five feet and four and a half inches.” I repeated: “Five feet and four and a half inches??” She repeated: “Yes, five feet and ….” You get the idea! Only I did not. I had her measure me again…of course! This time I made sure I could feel the metal bar at the top of my head, and I gingerly stepped from the under the bar and off the scale. Oh my…oh my…oh my! It was true…I grew!

Truth be told, I know logically that somehow in my forties I did not actually, literally, physically grow since last year. But it got me thinking…for the past month!

Where on earth did I get my earlier belief that I was five feet and three and a half inches? I have spent years attached to this number. Where did I pick that up from?? Who told me that? Me??? Did I dream it up somehow?

What truly rocked my world was realizing that for years (and by that I mean YEARS!), any time someone asked for or I shared my height, I would make life easier by rounding up. I would say, “Five four.” Sometimes I may have even sounded clearly assertive about this. But much of the time, I felt like a fraud rounding up. I even reverted to rounding down, so I would not feel like I was guilty of fibbing! Turns out I was fibbing…in the wrong direction!

So, what does this actually mean to me? It feels like a coming home of my sense of self. After years of shrinking to my ‘believed’ height, I am standing tall with a new image of myself. My identity is now an inch taller than I thought it was! The kicker: it was all in my beliefs. I gave away an inch of myself. I reverted to fibbing. I shrank my physical being, and in doing so, shrank my sense of self…literally! Amazing. It may only be an inch, but it has renewed a sense of my identity and my belief system in the most unexpected ways. I have a refreshed lens!

Granted, I realize that gravity is working in opposition, along with the aging process. One day, I may revisit five feet and three and a half inches. For now, I claim my full five feet and four and a half inches!

What belief can you change today?

“We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.” – Anais Nin